Giving

My first real experience in a big city was when I moved to Atlanta for college. This was the first time I had ever had to worry about my car being stolen. Or ridden a train anywhere. Or had to deal with serious traffic. Most importantly, it was the first time I had ever been face-to-face with the problem of homelessness. When I visited the school in the dead of winter, I cried like a baby when I saw someone asleep on a park bench, covered in newspapers. And I was utterly horrified when I offered to take the leftovers from my job at a restaurant and give them to homeless people, and my manager said I couldn't do it.

Then one day, I was on the train on my way to school when I noticed a woman in tears across from me. She told me that she needed formula for her baby, and didn't know how she was going to get it - and was out looking for a job today. I couldn't imagine seeing your own child hungry and not being able to solve the problem. So I gave her ten dollars. She burst into tears and thanked me about a dozen times. Half an hour after getting off the train, I saw her again. Coming out of the store with a carton of cigarettes, but no baby formula. I felt betrayed and angry that my money had contributed to lung Cancer, rather than feeding a hungry child. For the first time in my life, I understood the perspective of the people who refuse to help people who are begging on the street.

The fact is that there are always going to be people who take advantage of the system. Whether "the system" is welfare, unemployment, disability, or simply the kindness of strangers, you can never be sure that you are really helping someone who needs help. Sometimes, people will take advantage of you. It's horrifying to think that your attempt to help was a waste of time and money. But does this mean we should stop helping?

I spent a couple of months stewing in my anger about the deception on the train. Then one day, on the train again, a man and a woman got on. The man was well dressed and angry-looking. The woman, however, was thin as a rail with sunken eyes, hair that was all over the place, and obvious track marks on her arms. The well-dressed man spoke quietly with her. Although I couldn't hear what he was saying, it was obvious he was extremely unhappy. Without raising her eyes to look at anyone, the woman stood up, showed a hospital bracelet around her wrist, and announced to the train that she was homeless and hungry, and trying to get back home after she had been mugged and gone to the hospital to treat her injuries. She asked if anyone could spare a couple of dollars to help. The man sat down in a seat near the front and watched her every move as she made her way through the aisle, collecting change from the few people who paid attention to her. It occurred to me that this man was her pimp, or her dealer, or someone who was going to make her life a living hell if she didn't give him whatever money he was owed. Although I had no interest in giving this man money, it occurred to me that he may hurt or kill her if I didn't. Call me naive, but I gave her a couple of dollars anyway.

Our country, thanks to the Tea Party and a handful of other key players, is going through a selfish phase. Homeless people are deadbeats. AIDS patients are just reaping what they sow. And starving people in other parts of the world are not our problem, because Americans are the only ones that matter. Somehow, it has become acceptable to sit on our butts in our big houses with our plasma televisions and sports cars, while children in Somalia are starving to death. I was actually told the other day that Somalia could solve their own problems by overthrowing the government. Really? You can't read, know virtually nothing about the government, have no real access to weapons, and....well....there's also the problem that you are 25 years old and weigh 80 pounds, which most likely cuts down on your ability to fight effectively. Did you hear that, starving child in Somalia? It's your fault.

The fact is that as human beings, we all have an obligation to help however we can. You don't have to give away your life savings, but which is going to make more of a difference 20 years from now: If you drop half a million dollars on a gas-guzzling Italian sports car? Or if you take half of that money for a nice, reasonable car, and give the rest to a charity that provides food and clothing for a refugee camp? Which will you remember more: spending the afternoon sitting on the couch watching football? Or volunteering to educate homeless, pregnant teens about how best to ensure that their child is healthy?

The same people who bitch about the fact that the average American gives slightly less than $100 per year in taxes for foreign aid, are often the first to point out that America is the greatest country in the world. And it IS a great country. But it didn't become that way by being selfish and ignoring those in need. If that was the case, this country never would have survived the Depression. Yes, sometimes, we will unwittingly throw away our money for someone who doesn't really need it. But I bet the person who manages to live to see adulthood because of someone else's kindness will appreciate it enough to more than make up for the con artists. It's well worth the risk, in my opinion.