It all balances out in the end.

A close friend of mine was born into truly rotten circumstances. He was taken away from his parents at 9 years old, because his father was in prison and his mother was involved in drugs and various other crimes. He bounced around foster homes for years before landing in a group home for high-risk boys. Upon graduating from high school, he was shown the door, with basically the shirt on his back. He worked two jobs while pursuing a physics degree. Today he has a Masters' in physics, is happily married with three children, and has his dream job working for General Electric, and making a salary that is significantly above average.

My friend credits his success with one thing: he learned from not only his own mistakes, but also the mistakes of others. He saw what happened to himself and his brother when his mother began getting herself in trouble. So he decided that whatever it took, he would not repeat her mistakes. He remembered what it was like to be a lonely teenager with no one to give him any guidance - so he makes an extra effort to spend time with his own children. And his experiences as a child made him more resilient - meaning that when he was in college and wasn't sure how he was going to pay rent, it wasn't nearly the catastrophe that it would have been for some of the other college kids I knew. (After all, being a few days late on the rent does not exactly compare to being dragged, kicking and screaming, away from your parents at nine years old, does it?) So he didn't crumple and give up, and take the first job that came along. He finished college. He got a job. He started a family.

Another person I knew in college had the opposite problem. He attended an expensive, private college, funded by his parents. They also paid for his apartment, his car, and his insatiable World of Warcraft habit. Upon graduation, he got a job at Radio Shack. Not as a high-powered executive, but as a sales associate. It didn't pay well, there was little room for advancement, and from what I've been told, he hated it. Rumor has it that at one point he attempted suicide.

My point is that almost any set of circumstances can be an asset or a detriment to one's well-being. Adversity is what makes us stronger, more independent, and more able to handle whatever life throws at us. So who was born into better circumstances? The kid whose parents bought him everything he ever wanted, ensured that he could focus on his studies instead of having to get a job, and ensured that he had the best possible education? Or the kid born to drug addicted parents who pretty much raised himself and had to struggle for everything he ever had?

At risk of being verbally bitch-slapped for saying so, I truly believe they were somewhat equal in the end. One had a childhood packed to capacity with adversity and heartbreak. But that allowed him to take care of himself and sympathize with others in similar circumstances. The other had a fantastic childhood, filled with every opportunity a child could ask for. Except, of course, the opportunity to make mistakes and learn from them. So when he was out on his own, he had no idea how to deal with even the smallest of problems.

We all have problems in our lives. And we all have periods that we think will never get better. The most important thing we can do is to remember the bad times, and use those memories and lessons to create our own good times. No one likes dealing with personal tragedies and hardship. But to the extent we can, embracing adversity as a "challenge" rather than a "brick wall" will enhance not only our own lives, but that of the people around us as well.

So basically what I'm saying (a bit more tactfully than usual) is that instead of throwing our hands up in the air and giving up, we should learn from our environment and experiences, and thank whoever you believe in that you live a life that allows you to be more prepared for future endeavors. More importantly, be thankful that previous bad experiences have created a person that is more than capable of handling whatever problems you are facing at this moment.